I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I did not marry a roomba.
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