He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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