in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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