Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize