Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
