What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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