Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
