So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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