omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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