who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize