He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
