Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize