I'm lost and stupid without you.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
