Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Randomize