When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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