Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
