What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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