New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
