I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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