Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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