I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
