Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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