i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
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