One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
