after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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