So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
