Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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