i think i have two assholes
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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