everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
