Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Help me help you realize you are a moron
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
