scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
