wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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