I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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