if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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