I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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