pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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