Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Randomize
