He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
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He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
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do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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