gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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