Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize