i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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