Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
