Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
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His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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