I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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