How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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