hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
It's just like the Real World with babies
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
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she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
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I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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