tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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