1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
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the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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