I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
