I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Let's paint friendship bongs
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
